This is the time of year when Floridians feel they are outnumbered on the highways and stores by visitors and “snowbirds.”
I know some people don’t like that term. Texas calls them “winter Texans” and that’s OK with me. But dozens of winter people belong to clubs using the term, including some 100,000 Canadians that are now enjoying our beaches and attractions.
If you wonder if we Floridians can tell apart the natives from the visitors now that rental cars don’t use special plates that benefit our criminal crowd – the answer is a big, fat YES. Just like a Parisian can tell the Americans as they walk past the cafes, Floridians can be distinguished from our visitors.
Funny But Elderly Floridians Would Never Sit Here
Here are some observations I have made while living in “The Warm Winter Weather State” since 1961:
When we Floridians enter a large parking lot, we know where the few shady spots are located and if there is no decent shade, we park our cars facing away from the sun. If we have a sun shade, it will be silver and custom fitted.
We only smile when a tourist bitches about the heat in July, particularly if they are spending a mint at Walt Disney World.
Unless it is frigid cold, we wear flip flops to nearly every occasion.
When we hear lightning even if it is far away, we are the first to run for cover. I don’t care if there isn’t a cloud above our heads.
This Is Not Disney’s New Nighttime Production
Floridians won’t accept an invitation in the summer to go to Walt Disney World unless your visitors have reservations for a window seat at California Grill about the time the Magic Kingdom is closing.
Floridians won’t leave their beach vacation when they hear a hurricane has entered the Eastern Caribbean. We got a day or two of nice weather and can get home in a few hours.
You Decided To Vacation In July – Hot Rain Hot Rain
Floridians don’t foolishly jump off a pier without looking. I can’t list all the living things that like the shade of a pier.
At Least This Is Saltwater – No Gators
Floridians do not feed seagulls or pelicans especially if we are at a family picnic.
We are the first to head in the opposite direction when we see an alligator on the pathway in front of us.
Isn’t That Jud’s bike and Mary’s?
We will look bored when people start talking about how things are done elsewhere. After-all, you came to Florida – we didn’t go where you came from.